Writer•Photographer•Director

Another set from the plastic/pantyhose series that I never finished. Katelyn was exactly what I wanted for these, I fondly remember this day and laugh when I think about the cows that watched us lol.

Even though I didn’t do much regular work from 22-24, I did continue to create. Here’s little tidbits from that timeframe.

What compelled me to believe that I had nothing left to say anymore? I do not know. But I thought it likely that I might never say anything - ever- again. The darkest part of this notion, was the particular calm with which I accepted the idea without a struggle. Where was my feral mind? My spiting, insatiable, and dangerous hunger had left a hallowed silence. I felt forsaken by my own spirit, a betrayal unlike any I had known. Stuck in a void of my own design. How selfish.

"We only have what we give.''

Artist portraits commissioned by Our Jackson Home for Porchfest 2021

Alice Hardin, known professionally as Alice Calvery, is an independent singer songwriter. She currently resides in Jackson, TN. Drawing from folk, gospel and classic country traditions her songwriting weaves together storytelling and spirituality. She was featured on Paste Music’s Daytrotter sessions and has released two EPs , one with Grammy winning artist Ben Tanner from the Alabama Shakes.

I remember when I was becoming familiar with the idea of God, or omnipotent power. In Sunday school it was broken down pretty basically that GOD knows everything like what we’re going to do and what we have done -good or bad. I thought about this concept the next time I played with my toys. Afternoons were spent piecing together compounds, characters being established and rules set for the little world that was brought into existence on the living room floor. It occurred to me, as I crudely bumped Playmobils together in an effort to further the storyline (babies don’t just appear, I wanted to be authentic.) That I too, am like God. I know everything that these little plastic people will do because I invented their lives, I created their existence from the shallow puddles of my 6 year old imagination. I observed them lying together on the brightly colored bed, from above their roofless home.. and suddenly, I thought of my own existence and wondered who was staring down at me with their giant greedy eyes and moving me about with their greasy fingers, controlling and planning my life.... maybe-possibly deciding what cruel and unnecessary circumstances would befall me, as I did with my own toys. The idea was haunting, and still disturbs me some days. I wonder who’s out there, contemplating taking the red pill / blue pill, setting the entire world on fire, making us all orphans and chain smoking.

This season is about removing the film from your nose and eyes and lips and mouth. We are born a hundred different times in this lifetime if we want, and each birth you must open up and scream. Wipe the embryonic sac of your past traumas and failures and experiences that fed you, and grew you and carried you to this next chapter. Embrace the vulnerability of starting new again. Carry your previous seasons like tattoos on your skin, reminders of the prior incarnations -the valuable lessons you’re taking with you now. You are your own. You belong to no one. No one owns you, or your gifts. You are not a percheron to be harnessed, to pull weight that doesn’t belong to you. You are no one's windmill, no one's sails. Only upon the threshold of death will you ascend the final peak. Let no man tell you otherwise. So: friends, travelers, doers, Be-ers.... Lift the veil, clear the film, open your mouth and continue forth.

I had no clue how to even begin sharing this last set. These photos all together tell some sort of story, but hold their own by themselves too. This location had so many nooks and crannies with different light quality, temps, and composition opportunities. This was the first time in awhile I let the set itself have influence on how/what I shot. My life is a charmed one, this crazy path led me to Acacia and this location and I couldn't be more thankful for the people who have been brought into my work (LIFE) this year. I am humbled and honored to get to make the art that I do

Like Weeds coming up through cracks in the sidewalk, I will grow where I’m not supposed to.

“I can never read all the books I want; I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want. I can never train myself in all the skills I want. And why do I want? I want to live and feel all the shades, tones and variations of mental and physical experience possible in my life. And I am horribly limited.” ― Sylvia Plath

"Where we go when he closes my eyes and under what country: some blue darkness, farther than hell; a landscape of absence and root and stone. There are no bodies here, we dream shapeless dreams - a constant cloudless storm." ― Cecilia Woloch

Women are savage beauties —

only a thing of beauty which brings forth

new life could be so capable of such savagery,

of such destruction —

of death upon her own body.

— Segovia Amil

Venue: Clementine Hall

Catering: The Daily Dish, A Restaurant & Catering Company

Florals: T. Villager Designs

Coordinators: It Takes Two Planning & Event Design

Cake: Pink Blossom Bakery

Music: The Downtown Band: Corporate & Wedding Entertainment

Photo booth: Lets Booth It

Rentals: Liberty Party Rental

Hair: Krista at Style House Salon + Gina Micheletti

Makeup: Shelby McLeod + Jessie Clark

Officiant: Chris Nichols, Crosspoint Church

“We sometimes congratulate ourselves at the moment of waking from a troubled dream: it may be so at the moment after death.” — Nathaniel Hawthorne

I'm from a place where the cottonwood drifts delicately and feels so whimsical, but we all harbor a mutual disdain for the mess and stickiness it leaves behind. I'm from a place where we have beaches of silt and our sand will kill you second, the tide first. I'm from a place where the winds howl and scream, hurricanes blow, but the roof stays on. I'm from a place where birds mimic the sound of your auto-start, and remember your face. I'm from a place where the silence is so loud you can actually hear single snowflakes fall in the winter. I'm from a place where you can lay in the grass, untouched by mites or fleas. I'm from a place where the darkness engulfs you, in its cold and icy choke all winter. I'm from a place where the sun never sleeps in the summer, and skinned knees at 11:45 pm is just apart of your 20 hour day. I'm from a place where bears maul and moose charge, where belugas gather in the arm, where salmon red in the creeks. I'm from a place that never felt like it was my home, in all its strangeness and wild. It's possible, that I am not a puzzle piece and I'm just not meant to fit.

“Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.” ― Oscar Wilde

“If I could say it in words there would be no reason to paint.” – Edward Hopper

Even in one of the most overcast states in the nation, I still manage to find a little bit of sunlight to throw people in. Kenna has been on my bucket list of people to photograph and I'm over the moon that I got to do that this last trip home.

“The yellow is unsteady. The more I try to capture what it's like now, the less steady it seems. But it's still there, and yellow all right." - Susan Blackmore

All I can think about is how I wish she had had something savage coursing through her skin. God should have made girls lethal when he made monsters of men. ― Elisabeth Hewer

“There are two distinct languages. There is the verbal, which separates people… and there is the visual that is understood by everybody.”

A little pastel goth version of Kissin' Kate Barlow, a dash of Supernatural, some Westworld to taste with a Colter Wall/Orville Peck remix playing in the background.

I don't know who she is, but I want to be her. Thank you Allison Purifoy for one of the MANY characters you transformed into for me yesterday afternoon.

“The seeds of liberation are planted across the common table as we break bread together.”

This shoot was planned out three weeks ago. I wanted to recreate a scene from a movie that I felt like was moving and powerful. In the time that passed between the inception and actual creation, the shoot unfortunately took on a new context.

“I felt alone, my loneliness suffocated me, and I craved to scream, shout and kill me while seeing all this. However, self-hatred also occupied me.” ― Shaikh Ashraf

I found this vintage top/skirt set a few weeks back at goodwill. The top has hidden buttons in the back, and fabulous should pads. I've been saving it for a special occasion and it fit Phoebe like a glove. I love being able to have a prop closet (and justification to buy whatever from GW + City thrift lmao)

tell me the story of sweetness,

and how it never really leaves.

give that to me only,

for I want nothing else.

let us reek of syrup

in the hot sun.

I want everyone to know, that we're in love.

Would you believe me if I told you about the hornets nest in my rib cage, and the yellow jackets in my brain? If I grabbed your hand and put it to my chest would you say you thought the constant buzzing was all in my head, (which indeed it is) or would I have to reach deep within my throat and pull them out by their wings? To prove their existence -even as they thump against my skull from the inside- do I have to roll my eyes back and to the side and let them claw their way out of my sockets? I'd do it,a thousand times over if it meant that you'd understand.

“What we don't understand we can make mean anything.”

― Chuck Palahniuk

It is very rare that I design a shoot to be 100% personal. Most of the time I try to employ elements that are, but leave it open to interpretation.

This, right here is a direct reflection of how I have been feeling recently. Even prior to what is happening now with COVID-19. I've felt tainted, trapped, suffocated. I've had to make decisions, and stress, and worry about things I can and can't control. I feel scared, angry, zoned out. I've been feeling like a failure, a looser, a give up -er.

But this, this act of art made me feel okay. Rebirth is ugly and beautiful, sad and scary all at the same time. I've likened my current state to that of a tadpole. I don't relate much with butterflies. The process to my final frog stage is strange and feels backwards sometimes, like loosing a tail to slowly grow odd fetus frog arms/legs..

All of these weird stages and times are apart of the journey. What is happening now in me, in you, in our country, and the whole world, will shape our future in ways we can't quite conceptualize yet. But we will make it through, and we will transform.

Aimer, ce n’est pas se regarder l’un l’autre, c’est regarder ensemble dans la même direction. -Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Silence, blindness and temporary fixes. We dig deep within us to find the tenderness, togetherness and the cycle breaking missteps. When we are cold we seek warmth, water when parched. So I ask you to seek love when you are hurting. Give love when you are healing. Reach out when hands are grasping and pull up those who are falling. Only we can change the world around us, but first we must be ready to change ourselves.

Blush + Bubbly

On the outside, this styled shoot embodies all that is lovely, pink, and happy. Behind the scenes it represents the friendship and unity between myself and a really incredible group of ladies. This is the most beautiful set we've put together as a collective and I am so proud of each of the women that were apart of this. Everyone gave their own little pieces to make this perfect..

Vendors

Venue: SamSlay Photography

HMUA: Daisey Richardson & Mikayla Simpson

Bridesmaids Dresses: AW.Bridal

Tablescape + Floral Styling: Eclectic Mo's

Rentals: M&M Rentals

Jewelry: Sonder Finery Co.

Cake: Glynis Langston Dexter

Hand Painted Jacket: Carly Design Co

Models

Bride: Maegan Malady

Bridesmaids: Molly May, Bethany Brock, Amy McAlpin Childress

“A strong woman stands up for herself. A stronger woman stands up for everybody else.”

The sun peeped out from behind the clouds for us, for just a second and made these images of Tori in vintage Adolph Schwman for Lilli Ann dress. I've been saving this piece for someone special and Tori fit that bill.

I really love making portraits. Everyone has their own elaborate, colorful history; for just a second I get to share in that story. Frame it, hang it, and help tell it. It meant the world to me, that Abbey let me be apart of hers. A friend from a different lifetime, a lifetime that seems so distant and unreal. Sharing this experience made it not seem so far away again.

I met Todd Miller Jr. by chance this summer, at the place he works. Grier and I sat and chatted with him for about 45 minutes while he was assisting us. When we left and got into the truck, I turned to Grier and said "Man, I should have given him my card/number he would be so amazing to photograph" and Grier agreed. Fast forward to August at our second Shoot the Shit event for Create and Collaborate: The Workshop. Our model Riece shows up with ~hold the phone~ TODD!! I ran up to him and started babbling about how he may not remember me but ever since that day I was kicking myself for not asking is contact info and would he be interested in modeling etc etc and the rest is history.

Since that day, I have envisioned this shoot for him. I wanted the color story to be simple but captivating. Beautiful on their own, but commercial enough that Tiffany's could add diamond bracelets, watches and earrings and there would be a whole campaign.

Needless to say, I'm getting one of these bad boys printed for the house.

We live our lives in levels. Status, age, dopamine function. There is different levels to our pleasures, our sadness. Our Heavens and our Hells. Our color gradient for what we consider black, or white and what we decide is grey also exists within these self designed tiers. I find myself looking for a strange in-between. A juxtaposition between brightness with lots of color and an unnerved, slightly dark (deep dark of our souls dark..) translation of color, clothing, and set. There is a unique kind of authenticity that lives within this realm. It swirls around with Hedonistic tenancies, dashed with Nihilism but a lust for spirituality. It's chaotic and neutral. Uncomfortable yet warm. I want to build my life's work here.

Haley Hendrix - s/o to Walmart and their $2.37 face paint, you're the real MVP.

You guys know how much I love high contrast color and weird elements, so here's some of Hannah eating fruit loops whilst being covered in baby oil.

Yellow dress was thrifted in South Carolina this summer, pink neck piece is actually a vintage children's skirt from Sonder Finery Co.. Yellow background and blue bottom piece are spray painted glass left over from framing prints. The pink drink is grapefruit juice mixed with heavy whipping cream. (Yes I gagged making it)

Whitney is someone who I admire as an artist, and business woman. She is incredibly hardworking (be it tattooing, fitness, etc) and I love being around her. When someone like Whitney says "I want to do a 20s/30s style shoot" you say YES and WHEN! I'm still drooling over these and I wish we could all just dress like that everyday.

Here’s a little something I wrote for my own Mama.

She taught me the best paths are usually rough, uncharted and sometimes upstream. She has healed herself of wounds that most ignore and allow to fester.. wounds that are usually passed on to the next generation so no one can escape hurt. She asks forgiveness from no one and instead forgave herself so she did not ferment her womb. She cleansed it so her daughters could be born free of the pain of the past. She spoke love and kindness into the meals she made to help make us good on the inside. She braided strength into our hair every morning (topped with a bow for good measure) and dressed us in matching armor. She is power, a force of nature herself. She is a storm that birthed hail and hurricanes.